Silver screen-inspired food. May contain trace elements of silver.
Halloween is upon us and I don’t give a flying witch’s ass. I hate haunted houses. They are dark and I’m clumsy. I hate people and these people get all up in your face like it’s their job or something. I hate carving pumpkins. Where is the fun in this? You think it’s going to…
Vacation has had a bit of a rocky start but things look good now. We’re on the road, Ellen has dozed off so she isn’t nagging me, the kids are fighting but I can drown them out and there is nothing but blue skies ahead! Huh. That red convertible is coming up kind of fast…
I would like to start this column by saying it’s only kinda going to be about The Muppets. Yes, they have a new show coming out. I guess maybe you should watch it? I don’t know. I have mixed emotions about it. I think maybe The Muppets should never do anything again unless Jason Segel…
In general, Netflix has been hitting it out of the fucking park with their original programming. House of Cards, Orange Is the New Black, Daredevil, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt … and those are just some of their original series. They’ve done specials (tons of comedy) and they’ve picked up shows that we were devastated to see…
You may ask yourself why a 30-year-old woman would have any interest in a 75-year-old man. If not for money … if not for fame … if not for some weird betrothal … then why? As a long-time fan of older men, I have plenty of reasons lined up. With Gene Wilder, it’s his humor,…
I think everyone my age has a story about when they watched Jurassic Park. It came out in 1993. That means I was approximately nine years old when I watched it. My mom took me and my brother to the drive-in. (That makes me seem even older.) A nine-year-old watching a movie about giant dinosaurs…
There’s this up-and-coming actor… he’s hardly done a thing. Totally untalented. He’s a little homely. He has no charm, what-so-ever. He has this terrible British accent. People have a really hard time rooting for him. You probably haven’t even heard his name. It’s Beneduck Cucumberpatch. Or… something like that. Regardless, I see something in him…
I am an unbalanced, quirky kind of girl. The more I learn about people, the less bad I feel about my eccentricities. I suffer from depression and many, many anxieties. I always kind of felt alone in this situation. But it turns out, a lot of you are just as fucked up as I am….
I don’t think this has escaped anyone … but, OMG guys: The Hobbit: the Battle of the Five Armies came out this week. This is mostly important because I get a second movie that combines my dragon fetish with wonderboy Benedict Cumberbatch. I know that the Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings has been…
Genius. Badass. Trivial Pursuit Champ. Inventor of Revolutionary Devices. Protector. Witty. Master of Ninjitsu. Why wouldn’t I have had a massive crush on Donatello as a child? I was big into the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Being a child of the late 80s/early 90s… I don’t really even think it was an option. I watched…