Bran's Scalloped Roots

Game of Thrones: Bran the Time Traveler

The world is a cruel and dark place. The most beloved show of all time (that’s a claim I’m making without basis but I feel to be true) is beginning its last season. Game of Thrones. Was that not clear? Even worse, it’s being split up over the next two years. If that’s not George R. R. Martin-style torture, I don’t know what is. Well I do know what is… and it involves a lot more blood and cannibalism… but this is pretty bad too.

I think we’re all curious what’s going to happen, especially now that the show has surpassed the books. It’s no longer in GRRM’s hands. Yeah, I know he shared the outcomes with them, but it just doesn’t FEEL like his anymore.

But knowing it will be his end game, I have a few theories in mind and they aren’t all that positive. I have created three recipes, one for each of my ideas on how the series will end. I know that when all is said and done, I’ll have been ridiculously wrong, but it’s fun to speculate. Today’s recipe is covered in cheese… actual cheese and figurative cheese. I posted my first theory yesterday and I’ll be posting the last theory tomorrow. Stay tuned and feel free to chime in with your own speculations!


Bran the Time Traveler

This might be a bit optimistic, but it means something that Bran has broken through time and has been able to communicate with people in the past. Hold the door. He even got Ned to look back, thinking he heard something. I think this is going to be a huge part of the show’s ending. He’s had all this sketchy communication up until now, but I think it’s his connection to the trees that’s really going to make it a viable form of fucking shit up.

How much time did Ned spend at the heart tree in Winterfell before the series started? We KNOW he was always there praying, being all devout and contemplative and shit. How easy is it going to be for Bran to talk to Ned through the tree? I think he’s got this. I think he can warn Ned in the past and change the course of history.

It might be a cheap trick, but it’s very possible that Bran can undo all of this insane GRRM-style blood bathing that the show is so well known for. To drive home Bran’s connection with the trees, I have made Scalloped Roots. As he becomes more in tuned with the trees, so will we… by eating them… with cheese.

Scalloped Roots
6 medium potatoes
1 parsnip, peeled
2 carrots, peeled
3 tbsp butter, unsalted
2 cloves garlic, minced
½ onion, diced finely
3 tbsp flour
2 cups whole milk
2 cups freshly shredded cheese blend of your choice (I used cheddar and fontina)
1 cup panko breadcrumbs
2 tbsp olive oil

Preheat oven to 350°F. Spray a 9×13 baking dish with cooking spray and set aside.

Using a mandolin, finely slice potatoes, parsnip and carrots. Toss veggies together and lay in the baking dish.

In a medium saucepan, melt butter. Add in garlic and onion and stir until the onions are translucent and the garlic is fragrant (about 3 minutes). Mix in flour. You’ll have a thick goo. Slowly whisk in milk. Simmer low until milk is thick and bubbly (about 2 minutes). Remove from heat and stir in the cheese, in about four segments. Salt and pepper to taste. (I like a lot of salt.)

Pour sauce over the veggies. Toss the breadcrumbs in the olive oil and sprinkle over the top. Cover with foil and bake for one hour. Remove the foil and bake for another half an hour.

The potatoes should be soft and the smell should be amazing. Let cool for a few minutes before serving.

Fontina has an Ohio heart and Philly spunk. She loves giving you recipes for hearty food, pop-culture puns and a hell of a lot of craft beer. You can find her in the kitchen, at the bar, on Twitter or marathoning episodes of Shin Chan or Bob's Burgers online.

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